Mothering Yourself
Happy Mother’s day to every women on earth!
We women are actually all mothers. We each have that loving, caring, nurturing and mothering side to us, regardless if we have taken those motherly ways to be expressed by physically birthing a live mini me child or have consciously or unconsciously decided otherwise and have no human babies to tend.
How do you carve out time to be a mother for yourself? Is a question all women need to ask themselves.
Then be quiet enough to hear the answer from within, and truly listen to the advice of the mother within you, who always knows best!
We all have this wise mother within that we can draw on when we feel lost. Or when life gets a bit to quick, or too much, like my situation below.
A somewhat typical morning at our house these days......
6:30 AM the alarm clock abruptly awakens me from another incomplete sleep... so tired, not wanting to get out of bed and then I muster the strength to do so, cause... coffee.
Often with joe in hand I attempt to awaken my daughter for school, who also regrets the demand to get up! If there is anything worse then a groggy mama, it's a groggy mama and daughter together navigating the morning.
Ok we are out of bed! Success! Then it’s off to make breakfast, arranging pony tails, packing another school lunch that I'm afraid she's board sick of because well I'm board sick just from packing it at this point. And no matter how long it takes to make up her healthy organic homemade lunch, I seem to always hope that well it at leasts lives up to that of her friends lunches, that knee you in the gut, "not good enough" judgment can creep in to the not awake yet mind. It's early in the am. I likely didn't get a full 8 hours. But I take a breath and let that go, she likes her lunches and appreciates when I make them, she prefers my food over others and knowing this warms my heart enough to take a slower breath
.....and I take a little pause when adding in my favorite part of packing her up for school, a lunch love note just to remind her of how special she is. Because she is and we all are.
Then it's off to feed the dog, the cat, where is the cat?, tidy the dishes, oh out of milk, "must go to the store, don't forget that tired brain ok, we need milk", oh and also while at the store ...."also don't forget ...more coffee, kids chewable vitamin C, but not the brand from last time, so look for the one with kids hiking on it she liked that one.."
Looking around for the time, “5 minutes, then we leave”
“Did you fill up your water bottle? Room light off? Check check lets go!”
I sit in my car after dropping my daughter off. I enjoy watch her walk slowly into campus (cause...her book bag is getting heavy at age 10, my bag at 10 wasn't that heavy?) as she leaves my car and walks into her world of school life and I just dropped her off at school yet it seems like a huge feet.
I feel like it's often this morning scramble and I sit to collect my floating energy as I remember the miracle of life for a quick second. But the feeling the residuals of the morning mommy routine are hard, and a lot to handle and I let them move through me and I sit tired before them before the day has started.
In this moment I thirst for ease and comfort. Truth is, the morning mommy routine is focused on the needs of my dear daughter, and not on mine. When she's gone at school, my inner voice can sometimes finally be heard and will let me know what my body needs now that it can tend to it. How easy is it to get caught up in the daily routine and ignore that inner voice; moving throughout our day rushing from one thing to the next. Easy...
Not today. I listen, and I write this to ask if you are listening? Are you taking care of your needs in the way you take care of your child's, partner or loved ones?
And with that question, it is followed by a compassionate understanding that self-care is a practice just like that of moving on your yoga mat. If it has been awhile since you tapped in, it might feel foreign, you may feel off balanced, and even the thought of rolling out the internal yoga mat can feel overwhelming.
My Personal Go to Self-Care Practices:
Take a hike - lay on the ground, feel the sunshine, breath deeply, watch a bird, a plant mindfully and with awe, nature appreciation and being in nature are healing.
Walk outside - the simplest walk outside my current environment helps shift my perspective, pause in the back yard, check up on the veggie garden.
Women’s Circles - each month I bring together a group of supportive women and the nurturing and support is magically always just what I need.
Going on retreat - I need times where someone take care of me, someone cooking my food, making my bed and especially ideal if there is some form of movement on the retreat, hike, dance, yoga or meditation.
Taking a dip into natural water - Bath, hot springs, ocean plunge, all heal me and help me rejuvenate my body and build up my strength.
Just as I would hold space for my dear daughter as she is expressing her needs, I want to remind you to do the same for yourself. How can you this Mother’s Month recommit yourself to your own motherly self-care practice?
Could that involve a retreat? Then get your sweet self to a WOMENS RETREAT?. Designed to nourish the women, with ample time for motherly self care to fill ones cup.